Applicant Must Leave the Kingdom

I was told that in the first 7 days after the meditation retreat in Chom Thong, I would feel the effects of the practice. And what a week it's been.

Instantly I was overwhelmed by the frenetic pace of the traffic just outside the temple. Motorcycles and drivers whizzing by in a country where pedestrians definitely don't have the right of way. Market stalls set up in the temple parking lot selling food and clothes and knock-off goods. A fair just opposite the small marketplace full of bumper cars and games. Life in the temple is certainly slower paced!

One of the skills I've been honing in Thailand is the ability to bargain, which seems to be one part disinterest and another part downplaying. The tuk-tuk drivers constantly over-bid the routes I came to know in Chiang Mai, and a mix of laughing at the price and suggesting I’d walk instead seemed to be enough to get the price down. But then again, I’d realize that I was getting a 100 baht ride for 80 baht, a savings of about 60 cents.

I remembered back to when I was reading Shantaram, when the author talks about negotiating in India, an time-consuming task that often results in heated arguments and severed ties, with little won in the end. Sure enough, sometimes paying extra – especially in a country where extra is not comparably much – has its benefits. The tuk-tuk drivers who overpriced rides to the train station were more patient when I took my time deciding on when I’d head down to Bangkok again, and were more likely to reveal that ubiquitous Thai smile. The travel agent who offered “special price for you” on the trip I took to the Chiang Rai province was the same one who called around when I asked how to get to Chom Thong.

And it was the travel agent, after a discussion of the overwhelming number of temples in Chiang Mai, who recommended visiting Wat U Mong. Built as a sanctuary for monks to study Buddhism, it is an other-worldly retreat just 4 km outside the city, covered by bamboo and dotted with small temples. The maddening traffic just outside the gates was hardly audible as I walked past moss-covered sculptures and bilingual signs claiming that “today is better than two tomorrows”.

Of course, as I found out, a fair amount of skepticism is also necessary. After meeting up in Bangkok, my friend Esther and I headed to the train station to get overnight tickets down southern Thailand. On arrival, we learned from the information desk that the 7:30 train was full and the 11:30 train would arrive at the transfer point too late to grab the morning bus to Phuket, where our plane leaving Thailand would take off. We were directed to a travel agent to get bus tickets that not only would be faster than the train, but would get us to Phuket more directly.

Night trains are bearable, with their fold-down beds and pillows, but sleeping in the “VIP” bus left a lot to be desired. While there was air-conditioning as promised, the fold-down seats hardly got to 45̊ and there were no blankets available. Sitting in the only space in front of the toilet were two buckets full of hand-washing water, making an already ungainly trip to the bathroom that much more difficult.

We arrived at the change-over point in Surat Thani at 5 am, and our bus finally arrived at 7 am. On our way through the city, we stopped at a travel agency, where we were told to wait for our bus to Phuket, arriving at 8:30. Confused, we talked to the agent, who said that, no, of course we wouldn’t be arriving in Phuket at 10 am, since it takes 5 hours to get there – only the direct bus from Bangkok reaches Phuket that early. There was a direct bus?

As the bus pulled in front, we were called into the office. Where would we like to be dropped off? They recommended staying outside of Phuket Town, preferring other areas of the island. We showed an interest in Karon, a small beach town on the Andaman Sea, and the travel agent types in her calculator: 400 baht. But isn’t it more cost-effective to get a bus or taxi to the smaller towns from Phuket Town? Oh, the buses don’t go that way anymore and the private taxis are even more expensive. Exhausted and fed-up, we paid and got on the bus.

Karon on the island of Phuket is a small beach town with little to do and little energy to do it because of the heat and humidity. This translated to a lot of walking on the beach but stopping partway to enjoy the shade, pausing for ice cream, and chatting over cool drinks. After the craziness of transportation, I wouldn't have had it any other way.

The night before leaving, we had the full Thai experience. First we got Thai massages, and my masseuse must've had a bad day because I ended up being twisted and cracked with great force. Afterward, we went to a popular local restaurant and ordered a "medium spicy" meal of a pad thai-like dish and green curry, which prompted us in the first few bites to order water and rice.

At this point, my extended visa in Thailand is expired, with a friendly stamp in my passport that says "APPLICANT MUST LEAVE THE KINGDOM NOT LATER THAN 15 JUN 2011". So onward to Singapore.